Hero Stories

Women in my workshop at the 2015 CT Women's Alliance Conference - theme of "We are Heroes of Our Own Stories' - shared some of their prized moments and habits:

I lost both my parents - was the older child - later got divorced, but coped!  Amazed at myself!

I don't lose my head in a crisis - I make good decisions, have compassion towards adversity and protect others.

I talk, talk, talk to my kids about faith, and cultural identity - as my parents did to me.

I practice forgiveness.

I did not allow circumstance to define me.  Be helpful!  Help others!

I secured 5 medals for my WW II father-in-law and went with him to a ceremony in Washington DC.

These brave women also reflected on advice they would give their younger selves, and how they picture their future selves.  We learn so much by sharing stories.

Your Own Best Friend

Eleanor Roosevelt told us that 'the future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams' and a celebrity icon, Diane von Furstenberg, echos that sentiment.  In a NYT 'Corner Office' interview by Adam Bryant (5/3/15), Diane asserts that you can't fake confidence - 'you look like an idiot.'  Her tough-love message is that 'in order to trust yourself, you have to have a relationships with yourself, you have to be hard on yourself and not delusional.' Also, DvF says the biggest lesson she learned early in life is that the most important relationship is the one you have with yourself -- then every other relationship is a PLUS, not a MUST!

Color!

Daring to act silly can brush off our mental cobwebs.  But by the time we are 'all grown up' we often resist looking like a novice.  The old saying, 'get out of the rut', applies to current brain research about the value of trying something new, shaking up the old synapses. 

Coloring books are associated with childhood, but are now resurfacing as a way to relax and get into a creative flow.  Johanna Basford was amazed that her intricate pen-and-ink drawings are a huge seller to adults who love to color!  In a NYT article, "Grown-Ups Get Out Their Crayons" (by Alexandra Alter, Business Day, 3/30/15), we learn about an 'untapped market' of adults looking to have fun with color.

When my daughter was 4, she told me "I am only an old baby."  Looks like she was wise beyond her years! 

Late Blooming?

Older brains are believed to excel in certain areas:  Practice wisdom comes from much experience; there is less drama on a daily basis (emotional regularity); we tend to look longer at the sunny side of the street; we know when to zig, and when to zag.  A recent study offers another possibility:  While processing speed declines with age, maybe an increased ability to reading other people's moods gives us a bump in emotional intelligence.  Being perceptive about others can help with decision-making, forging relationships, and generally avoiding toxic situations.  All things to cheer about.  Check out the NYT article, "Older Really Can Mean Wiser" by Bendict Carey (Mind section)  3/17/15.

What's Your Hurry?

  

Chances are that when you are feeling  late, late, late, for a very important date (or deadline), you can decrease your anxiety. Research says ... breathe deeply; reduce multitasking, and reframe your anxiety as excitement.  In other words, a lot of perceived goal conflict is in our heads, and we actually have more time than we think.  Don't be the harried rabbit.  (Source:  NYT article, "How We Find More Time" by Ann North, Op-Talk, 3/8/15)